In the many years that I have been in the game, the one area that has most concerned me is the parental jealousy in junior and youth football.
This often transfers to the senior ranks. I made a conscientious effort not to communicate with parents about football once a player turned 18.
Football – and for that matter all sport – is important, as ultimately youngsters learn life skills through being a part of a team.
I have witnessed parents being obsessed about their offspring becoming a professional to the extent that they force their child to play and train seven days a week for the 365 days of the year.
I can report that as a result of parents living vicariously through their kids, many a talented prospect has given up the game due to “burn out” and simply falling out of love with the game.
In reality, very few youngsters develop into top professionals and match their parents’ dreams for them. Parents need to support coaches in developing youngsters into good people first and foremost. There are far more important matters in life.
Parents need to direct their efforts towards helping children understand the value of hard work; earning the right to play in a team; the sacrifices that one has to make to achieve things in life; the value of learning from failure and mistakes; learning to be humble in defeat and magnanimous in victory; being a good sports person; fair play; understanding that there is no “I” in team it must be about “Us”, and respect for one’s opponent.
I urge parents to nurture kids by example. Do not abuse the referee from the sidelines; do not boo the opposition; do not question the team’s coach for his/her tactics and substitutions.
Please encourage your youngsters to give of their best in effort, and most importantly, ensure that your child is enjoying the game and not playing just to please you. It is so very important that a youngster plays a sport that he/she is passionate about, it is NOT about what sport the parent played!
As an example, I want to share with parents that on my annual “UK Football Experience Tours”, players attend lectures as delivered by football scouts on the lookout for special talent.
A former Manchester United scout revealed that only 180 players out of the 1.5 million players playing football in England will ever play a single minute in the Premier League.
A young player must be prepared to possess an unwavering dedication; exceptional work ethic; avoid injuries; have a mental resilience second to none; be capable of bouncing back from setbacks; all this whilst maintaining a balanced mental health caused by the immense pressure and above all, like everything in life, a player needs more than an ounce of luck!
